Two days ago you turned 9 weeks old. which means that you are over 2 months old now. The last nine weeks have felt like both the longest, and the shortest weeks of my life. I suppose for you they have seemed like an eternity, since these last nine weeks comprise your entire life.
It's amazing to me how you are an entirely different baby now than the one I brought home a couple of months ago. When you were first born everyone thought you resembled your Grandpa Paul, but at this point it is undeniable that with each passing day you are becoming the spitting image of your father. Even though when I look at your face I just see the face of Max, there is no disputing that your eyes, nose, mouth and skin tone come directly from your dad. And your long feet. And your complete lack of a bum.
There are a few things about you that I never want to forget. Right now at nine weeks you really like to be held. I know that all babies like to be held, but you reeeeaaaalllllyyy like to be held. I have been told it's impossible to spoil a newborn, which I hope is true because I hold you constantly. While there is a part of me that is concerned that I am teaching you bad habits, there is this other very real part of me that doesn't want to put you down because this time is fleeting, and I will never get to hold you like this again. I can't imagine that I'm messing you up too badly in life if I hold you a few extra hours a day. In a few weeks we will begin the grueling process of trying to get you to sleep in your crib (right now you will have none of that whatsoever) and put you on somewhat of a manageable sleep schedule. But for now you dictate how things go in our house, and you basically want to be in our arms at all times, with us looking directly into your eyes. In fact, everytime the phone rings and I try to simultaneously hold you and focus on the person on the other line, you become quite opinionated and make it impossible for me to carry on a conversation. It's kind of annoying, actually.
Speaking of sleep, you basically sleep through the night...if I hold you. You are generally pretty good about sleeping for about four hours each night until about 2:30 AM when you want to eat. After that, I know that you will be waking up each hour and the only way to get you to konk out for good is to just snuggle with you. If I would let you, you would probably just sleep in my arms for 24 hours straight. Generally around 5:00 AM I give up and bring you into bed with us. You are certainly in your happy place once I do that, and you give me this look that says "see? if you had just done this at 2:30 like I asked we'd all be happier." You don't seem to mind that your dad and I don't get to sleep past that point because we live in perpetual fear of squishing you in your peaceful slumber. We find it ironic, as I'm sure most parents do, that the only person in our family who gets a good nights' sleep is the one who also gets to nap all day.
At night you get a stuffy nose for some reason. So when you do wake up to eat, you snort quite a bit like a baby piglet. Your dad is fairly accustomed to the sound of a snorting, sniffing, guzzling baby chowing down next to him in the dark. Usually the grand finale of this milk orchestra is a diaper explosion, at which point your dad is on duty.
I never want to forget what it looks like when your dad walks with you. You enjoy your dad, but only for short periods of time right now. After about 10 or 15 minutes it becomes apparent that you would very much would like to have me back. But because I know that in a few short months the tides will turn and you will prefer your dad over me, I'm okay with the arrangement as it stands. You get fussy though sometimes, and so your dad will pick you up and put you over his shoulder. I don't ever want to forget what your little face looks like peering at me from over your dad's shoulder. It's a mixture of confusion, excitement, and nervousness about where he's taking you. Typically he's taking you to get your diaper changed, or sometimes just to walk with y ou up and down the hall. It's at those moments when my heart wants to explode with love for my two boys.
Sometimes I feel like I have three different babies. There is the baby that I see when you are alert with your eyes open. Then there is the baby that I see when you are sleeping, and finally there is the baby I see in your car seat with your face squished. When you are awake and alert you look so much like your dad, and you give off such a happy, content vibe. When you are sleeping you look like nobody else except for you...and all I can think of when I stare at you is that you are such a little boy. Many babies are somewhat gender ambiguous for a while, but no matter how many bows somebody might try to glue to your head or how many pink outfits they might try to dress you in, there would be no doubt whatsoever that you are a boy. When you sleep you look older to me. Often when I watch you sleep my mind drifts to when you go to kindergarten, because your sleeping face gives me an idea of what I think you'll look like then. Even though I like to fantasize about your future, it hurts to think about you growing up like that. And then when you are in your car seat you always look grumpy, and your double chin morphs into a quadruple chin.
You eat A LOT. While you are certainly filling out and getting that adorable classic little baby chub, when you stretch out on your changing table you are still clearly a skinny baby. You get that from your dad too. I don't know where you put all the food. I feed you pretty much constantly from about 7:00 AM to 12:00 PM, and then from 6:00 PM to 10:00 PM, with a few times in between. You are really strong and really tall, so I suppose you need all that milk to keep growing like a weed.
You hate to be swaddled, so we never really tried after you came home from the hospital. But you do like to curl up with me and a blanket, and if I drape the blanket over your head and wrap you up tight, it doesn't take long for you to pass out. This is kind of difficult given all of the heat waves we've had this summer, and the fact that you are a little furnace. But you don't seem to mind the heat so we just go with what works for you.
You smile most in the mornings and after your afternoon nap. Even though I know developmentally you are a long way off from laughing, I swear that sometimes you are on the verge of giggling. You have the most adorable smile and whenever you smile at either your dad or me you positively melt our hearts. Sometimes you do this little half-smile smerk thing, that looks like you know something we don't know. Like you have your own little joke that we are not privvy to.
You don't (thankfully) cry that much. In fact, sometimes you will go an entire day without really crying (although you do tend to get somewhat fussy and whiny for an hour so in the evening). But boy, when you do cry you really let it all out. We call it your "purple episodes." You turn as purple as plum and shake your hands violently by your head. Your head actually changes shape. Even though we know you are being very serious during these purple episodes and that you mean business, your dad and I secretly get a kick out it because it's kind of cute. You typically turn purple when you wake up both hungry and with a messy diaper. It's a deadly combination.
Finally, you love your bath. We put you in your whale tub and drizzle water all over you. I absolutely adore you naked, but always have this fear of getting pottied on--which has happened quite a few times in your short life. But you are so cute when you sit naked in your tub. Even though you get a bath every few days, each time is like a new experience for you that you have to get figured out from the beginning. It's a pretty special time for your dad and me though, and I'm trying to soak it all in now because I know that in not too long bath time will likely become far more of an ordeal.
And that's you in a nutshell at nine weeks. Below is a video of you saying "hi" at about six weeks old. Obviously you are exceptionally gifted.
Love you.
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